I have been with my partner – a wonderful, kind, caring man – for the best part of 15 years.
Naturally, we have shared much over this time.
And we probably thought we knew everything about each other.
But last weekend, as we sat in our Geraldton home and shared our thoughts on the gender equality debate and the looming protests across the country, I told him something that – at least in that moment – caught him by surprise.
“I am frightened to walk alone at night,” I told him.
“And every time I have to do it, I hold my longest key in my hand, sticking out between my fingers. Just in case.”
He couldn’t believe it.
This was a woman born and bred in Kalgoorlie who had left school at 15, withstood the rough and tumble of the corporate world as a construction lawyer, spent most of the past decade as a Federal MP in the very place that is now the focus of a cultural review, and had endured unspeakable grief.
My life experiences, which have shaped who I am today, meant that I had rarely – if ever – considered gender as something that had negatively impacted me.
I don’t feel like I have been discriminated against because I am a woman. I don’t feel like I have missed out on a job, or struggled for recognition.
If anything, it’s been the opposite.
I have no doubt that being a woman helped me stand out from the crowd as one of three women and 10 men vying for pre-selection for the seat of Durack in 2013.
After all, I was the woman with the red hair, the bright blue jacket and the big personality, taking on mostly men who – and I mean this in the nicest possible way – all looked the same, with their grey hair, grey suits and farming backgrounds.
I was no better than any of them, but I was certainly different. And I believed it helped me win that pre-selection.
It was that sort of experience that meant that when issues of gender became the focus of public debate in the past, my response had largely been to just ‘get on with it’.
But this time things are different.
I hear them. Women across the country are rallying against sexual assault, discrimination and harassment. And rightly so.
It’s why I joined thousands of women outside Federal Parliament on Monday. It’s time for things to change.
Let me be clear – this is a bloke problem, not a woman problem. Too often we hear about the number of women who have been raped, rather than the number of men who have raped women.
It is men who need to be better.
That said, this is not a man-bashing exercise. There are so many good, respectful men who are horrified at the way women are often treated.
But as a Government, we recognise that women are angry. We are listening. We are taking action.
We know that these are serious issues that many workplaces and communities in Australia are challenged by.
Everyone deserves to be safe in their workplace, and our national Parliament should aim to be a model workplace.
We have announced an independent review into Commonwealth Parliamentary workplaces, to be led by Sex Discrimination Commissioner Kate Jenkins. This will be powerful.
Parliament House is a very unique workplace. People from across the country come to Canberra for up to 20 weeks a year, away from home, and away from their families. It’s a stressful environment.
But it is still a place of work, and everyone who works there deserves to be safe.
Human resources procedures, including training, do need to improve. And as MPs, we must be the ones to lead by example.
There is much to be done outside Parliament too.
As a regional Member of Parliament, I am acutely aware of the difficulties faced by regional women, who often don’t get the support that’s required. We need to address this.
We are driving change through the National Plan to Reduce Violence against Women and their Children – a 12-year strategy that brings together the efforts of the Commonwealth, state and territory governments to prevent and address domestic, family and sexual violence.
Last week, we launched the $18.8 million third phase of the national campaign to reduce violence against women and their children, called Stop it at the Start.
This campaign encourages adults to “unmute” themselves and empowers them to take actions that will have a positive influence on the attitudes and behaviours of young people.
These are just a snapshot of the measures we have put in place as a Government, and are a significant step in the right direction.
But we all know more will need to be done, both inside and outside the walls of Federal Parliament.
It should start at school, where we must better educate young boys about respect for women to ensure that they grow into men understanding what is acceptable, and what isn’t.
As a leader in the community, I am determined to help bring an end to the sexual violence and harassment that too many women have had to endure.
I want to help ensure that future generations of women are confident to walk alone at night, and can leave that key in their handbag.